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@zoesbrother wrote:
@koolma_k wrote:
<<<< See my two flying monkeys
Where is your sixth word here?
Counted the arrows pointing at monkeys
MY LIVING WILL:
Last night, my kids and I were sitting in the living room and I said to them , ‘I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug .’
They got up, unplugged the Computer, and threw out my wine.
They are SO on my @#*% list …
<<<< See my two flying monkeys
I will bring two flying monkeys!!!
I still haven’t visited that final!!!
Oh, hope it doesn’t move Oz….
I am kinda new, I have been broken in by some Dr. D’s and Goldiediggers caches, but haveing just started this addiction I do not have all the needed tools for some of the more difficult caches… ie boats, climbing gear, ect…. I just saw a hint that there will be caches placed at the WB bash that will only be accessable by boat. So, if I want to try to get all the caches I would need to find someone to team up with who has a boat and is willing to share/steer/ect… It would be nice maybe to get some people together that have the experience on the more difficult terrain caches.
😉 😆 I have a ton of them 🙂
@labrat_wr wrote:
another way would be to stay indoors, though they do find their way into the house to, so nothing is foolproof 😀
Hmmm, that may work for a short time, I live in a large apt. complex, I could set up a mosquito free series….lol j/k
awww man… pop my balloon…lol
Well, I know I had success with skin so soft back in the 80’s 🙂
(I just hate the smell of mosquito spray!!)
oh, it was worth a shot wasn’t it?? 🙂Fart Football….
An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes
gas and says, “Seven Points.”His wife rolls over and says, “What in the world was that?”
The old man replied, “It’s fart football.”
A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says, “Touchdown, tie
score.”After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, “Aha.
I’m ahead 14 to 7″Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, “Touchdown,
tie score.”Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, “Field
goal, I lead 17 to 14.” Now the pressure is on the old man.He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard. Since
defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he’s got, and
accidentally poops in the bed.The wife says, “What the heck was that?”
The old man says, “Half time, switch sides
(sorry, suffering from a little insomnia…thought you might like the jokes 🙂
WOMAN’S PERFECT BREAKFAST
She’s sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton.WOMEN’S REVENGE
“Cash, check or charge?” I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase.
As she fumbled for her wallet , I noticed a remote control for a television set in her purse.
“So, do you always carry your TV remote?” I asked.
“No,” she replied, “but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.”
UNDERSTANDING WOMEN(A MAN’S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I’m not going to understand women.
I’ll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax,
pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root,
and still be afraid of a spider.
MARRIAGE SEMINARWhile attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication,
Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor,
“It is essential that husbands and wives know each other’s likes and dislikes.”
He addressed the man,
“Can you name your wife’s favorite flower?”
Tom leaned over, touched his wife’s arm gently and whispered, “It’s Pillsbury, isn’t it?
CIGARETTES AND TAMPONSA man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up & down the aisles.
The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him.
He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife.
She directs him down the correct aisle.
A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter.
She says, confused, “Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons for your wife?
He answers, “You see, it’s like this, yesterday, I sent my wife to the store
to get me a carton of cigarettes, and she came back with a tin of tobacco
and some rolling papers; cause it’s sooo-ooo–oo- ooo much cheaper.
So, I figure if I have to roll my own ……….. so does she.
(I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton!)
WIFE VS. HUSBANDA couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, “Relatives of yours?”“Yep,” the wife replied, “in-laws.”
WORDSA husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day… 30,000 to a man’s 15,000.
The wife replied, “The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men…
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, “What?”
CREATIONA man said to his wife one day, “I don’t know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
“The wife responded, “Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you !
WHO DOES WHATA man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, “You should do it because you get up first,
and then we don’t have to wait as long to get our coffee.
The husband said, “You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.”Wife replies, “No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee.”
Husband replies, “I can’t believe that, show me.”
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says “HEBREWS”
The Silent TreatmentA man and his wife were having some problems at home
and were giving each other the silent treatment.
Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:0 0 AM for an early morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, “Please wake me at 5:00 AM.” He left it where he knew she would find it.The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn’t wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.
The paper said, “It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.”
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.
A new supermarket opened near my house. It has an automatic water
mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the
sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain.When you pass the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and you experience the scent of fresh mown hay.
In the meat department there is the aroma of charcoal grilled steaks with onions.
When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying.
The bread department features the tantalizing smell of fresh bake
bread & cookies.I don’t buy toilet paper there any more.
In honor of Tax month…
Dear Internal Revenue Service
Enclosed you will find my 2009 tax return showing that I owe $3,407.00 in taxes.
Please note the attached article from the USA Today newspaper, dated 12 November, wherein you will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is paying $171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.
I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats (valued @ $2,400) and six (6) hammers valued @ $1,029), which I secured at Home Depot, bringing my total remittance to $3,429.00. Please apply the overpayment of $22.00 to the “Presidential Election Fund,” as noted on my return. You can do this inexpensively by sending them one (1) 1.5″ Phillips Head screw (see aforementioned article from USA Today newspaper detailing how H.U.D. pays $22.00 each for 1.5″ Phillips Head Screws). One screw is enclosed for your convenience.
It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward to paying it again next year.
Sincerely,
A Satisfied Taxpayer
04/27/2010 at 11:34 pm in reply to: geojellies4 – low cost investment for beginning coiners #1928027 -
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